Archive for May, 2011

Its time for finals. You can’t study at home because :

1- Your brother/sister is annoying as hell

2- Your mom comes in your room every minute asking if you want to eat or if you’re studying

3- That F***ing construction site next door that wakes you up every morning at 8 AM with the sounds of jackhammers.

and since studying in your room is out of the question, you head on down to the library. Good luck finding a place to sit. What to do…. What to do….

Well here in the Public Toilet, we have the solution for you! What is one place in a nightclub you go to talk to the phone because its not too loud? what is the one place at home that no one randomly walks in without knocking? What is THE one place that you can have all the privacy, peace, and quiet with minimal distractions?

Ok maybe not peace… but the rest… and yes, you guessed it, your nearest public or private toilet! So get your books… (laptops and electronics are not advisable) and head on down!

The toilet actually is one of the good places to review notes and get some reading done. (its actually how I studied history in S3). The time lost on the john is now time gained! As long as you breathe from your mouth, you should last long enough to finish a chapter or two. But please don’t go overboard, or else your toilet would end up looking like this :/

toilet library

*cough* nerd *cough*


Today’s Toiletainment episode is brought to you from the good people at, one of my personal favorite websites.
just follow the link by clicking HERE, or alternatively, follow the more extreme route and click on the picture below!

mean toilets

one of the awesomer toilets out there


Posted: May 18, 2011 in Toiletainment!

It was a slow morning on the 18th of may, 2011, where people casually woke up, prepared their coffee and begrudgingly headed to their vehicles to go to work/university/school/home(back from the mistress’s lair)… And then, we discover what happened last night.

We might think God, being you know, as old as life itself, would be more mature than to play a prank on the Lebanese people, but it’s nice that He shows his frat-boy side every once in a while. You see my dear readers, the Lebanese people woke up to find their vehicles, roads, buildings, plants and even pets, covered in what could only be described as heavenly diherria  (for those of you who did’nt get it, dont panic. its just muddy rain) . Truly remarkable, well played, God. Well played.

The extent of the coverage can be clearly seen by the following pictures of my very own vehicle, taken just minutes ago.

diherria covered vehicle

diherria covered vehicle

its something to see 90% of the cars on the road as if they’ve just come back from an accident involving a port-a-potty, and a steep steep hill. lets hope it dosen’t become a trend


Posted: May 17, 2011 in Toiletainment!

This afternoon, while faithfully sitting on the toilet… (actually no, i was in Arabic class. But it felt like a toilet, hot and sweaty, with an old man slowly trying to do his business, screaming at other people all the while… It felt like constipation, followed by an episode of explosive diherriea… but anyway…) I have realized that people need some entertainment while doing their business!

Be it stuff to do, or stuff related to said “business”, this new section will cover that and more!

And as a first post, our maiden voyage to the widely explored, yet massively uncharted lands of toiletainment, I  bring you a professional reporter worthy of appearing on this here blog. The fellow she’s reporting on has no idea where he’s sticking his hands… i just hope he finds the soap! (it was a urinal cake. soap rhymes better though)

(Video at the break)

(Just as a side note here, urine isn’t sometimes all bad. The ancient romans used it as detergent… they fermented it for that. so it could have cleaning properties, that man may be a genius! ok probably not. )

What does the title mean? is there a wolf in the toilet? WILL HE EAT ME?!

no not really. This  is an awareness post, and it serves to alleviate the constant fear most people have about public restrooms and what diseases they may hold. For those of you that are familiar with the pubic toilet across from the business gate in AUB, you have a clear idea of how bad public restrooms can smell, having their stench detected miles away. However, we should not be so keen to judge all restrooms the same way.

First of all, there’s common sense. If you see blood, pee or any other bodily fluid on the seat, it might be best not to sit on it. But if the seat is dry, you have nothing to worry about. A common item that 99% of lebanese public toilets lack (i think i’ve only encountered one here) is paper toilet seat covers. those could provide protection, but their main purpose is ease of mind.

Toilet seat cover

Now you would say that a toilet seat is covered with germs and all kinds of disease causing bacteria. And that is true. However so is almost any other surface anywhere. The truth of the matter is that the most common germs present on the seat (E.coli,salmonella, Hepatitis A) will not be transmitted by direct contact, so unless you have a cut on your butt (it rhymes, lol) you don’t have to worry about anything, as long as you employ common hygiene procedures ie. washing your hands afterwards.

So next time you gotta go, its safer to go than hold it in and risk soiling yourself. For extra care however, it never hurt to have purell with you and wipe the seat before sitting on it. supposedly it kills 99.9% of germs 🙂

This one is for the guys. As for the girls, it could serve as an insight as to what might plague the male mind when going to the public restroom. So girls, please, if you see your man twitching before going to the public restroom please be sensitive and remember, he might not just be pressed to answer nature’s call, but he might be nervous to remember all those complex codes and etiquette that comes with using the urinal.

Ah, the urinal. A beacon of hope for all male bladders everywhere. But to use it properly without being shot dirty looks and cursed under your urinal neighbor’s breath, one should take special care to honor the law of the “Splash Zone”.

The concept of the splash zone is basically that whenever a guy uses a urinal, if another guy needs to use a urinal as well, a minimum of one unused urinal must be in between them if at all possible. It is true that this is an unspoken law, but it is one that has been implemented time and time again. The following diagram should be sufficient explanation:

Splash zone

The red zones represent the Splash Zone: A no (unzipped) Fly zone

As demonstrated in the diagram, we are discussing the basic 5 urinal configuration which allows for a maximum of 3 users without Splash Zone infarction. For advanced configurations and case by case analysis, please refer to

The following case represents a heavy violation of the splash zone law where the violator could possibly be labeled as a : ” creep, pervert, freak ect….” or the guy may only be genuinely interested in you or just for the sake of comparison…

A big no no

Take extra measures when this happens... or just run away really really fast

Now most guys tend to head for the urinal on the far side of the room, and in the case of 5 urinals, its all fine and well. However, if a guy heads for one of the adjacent urinals, it becomes a real insult and an unethical thing to do, kind of like double parking your car on a curb. Yea we all curse at whomever left his/her car there. The following diagram should explain why.


Stalemate. If a 3rd party wishes to engage in the urination process, an infarction is forced upon him or he has to wait. The blame lies on the 1st user of the urinals

So guys, please, next time you use the urinal have some courtesy and some taste. Oh and I hope it goes without saying: Please, please, please…. Aim, and flush.

Send a mail to the Janitor in Chief at:

Quadrangle is a popular pool and music club in Hazmieh. Not only are they pool fanatics but apparently they also have a kickass sense of humor and that is portrayed in their toilet signs. BEHOLD!


The Quadrangle WC signs

Quadrangle Women

Women's WC

Quadrangle Men

Men's WC

Images courtesy of Rudy Boutros

Please feel free to send me signs and pictures of interesting WCs from around lebanon!
Send a mail to the Janitor in Chief at:

This poster was found in the restroom of Hooligans, right above the toilet seat. They’ve become quite creative with their instructions, I must say, and their slogan… tip o’ the hat!!!

(just for clarification, hooligans is a football pub… so you get the joke 😉 )



It Reads: Cause we know how to handle our balls

Please feel free to send me signs and pictures of interesting WCs from around lebanon!
Send a mail to the Janitor in Chief at:

This Page is dedicated to food, drink, and consumable items that make us, after a few hours, take that glorious walk to the toilet, put that seat down and really think and reflect on the events of the day, maybe get some reading done too.


Food For Thought!

Creative touches can be in the toilet design, the toilet stall, the sink or even the sign!
This was taken in Deek Duke Hamra

men's WC DeekDuke

Men's WC

Women's WC DeekDuke

Women's WC

Please feel free to send me signs and pictures of interesting WCs from around lebanon!
Send a mail to the Janitor in Chief at: